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Anchorman Quotes: Don’t Act Like You’re Not Impressed!

Milk on a hot day? That’s a bad choice.

The origin of San Diego? We all know it involves a female whale’s private parts.

About to get into a fight with a rival news team? You want Brick Tamland and his trident on your side.

Indeed, Ron Burgundy is a legend for a reason: he anchors what many consider to be the funniest movie ever made. And almost definitely the most quotable.

Watch Anchorman online to relive the best one-liners, quips, exchanges and insults… then and click through some of our favorite Anchorman quotes now. Don’t act like you’re not impressed by these…

16 Gut-Busting Anchorman Quotes
16 Gut-Busting Anchorman Quotes
1. You have a MASSIVE erection…
Veronica: Mr. Burgundy, you have a massive erection. Rob Burgundy: Really? Yes, I do. Um…I’m sorry, it’s the…it’s the pleats. Mm….

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Really? Yes, I do. Um...I'm sorry, it's the...it's the pleats. Mm. It's actually an optical...

Veronica: Mr. Burgundy, you have a massive erection.
Rob Burgundy: Really? Yes, I do. Um…I’m sorry, it’s the…it’s the pleats. Mm. It’s actually an optical illusion. It’s the pattern on the pants. It’s not flattering in the crotchal region. I’m actually taking them back right now. Taking them back to the pants store. Well I’m gonna go walk it off. Don’t act like you’re not impressed!

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You have a MASSIVE erection…

Veronica: Mr. Burgundy, you have a massive erection. Rob Burgundy: Really? Yes, I do. Um…I’m sorry, it’s the…it’s the pleats. Mm….


I’m in a glass case of emotion!

I’m in a glass case of emotion!

Ron Burgundy

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I’m in a glass case of emotion!

I’m in a glass case of emotion!


That doesn't make any sense.

Brian Fantana: They’ve done studies, you know. 60 percent of the time, it works every time.
Ron Burgundy: That doesn’t make any sense.

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That doesn’t make any sense.

Brian Fantana: They’ve done studies, you know. 60 percent of the time, it works every time. Ron Burgundy: That doesn’t make any sense.


What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How’d you do...

What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How’d you do that? Heck, I’m not even mad; that’s amazing.

Ron Burgundy

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What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How’d you do…

What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How’d you do that? Heck, I’m not even mad; that’s amazing.


It’s so damn hot. Milk was a bad choice.

It’s so damn hot. Milk was a bad choice.

Ron Burgundy

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It’s so damn hot. Milk was a bad choice.

It’s so damn hot. Milk was a bad choice.


It is anchorman, not anchorlady. And that is a scientific fact.

It is anchorman, not anchorlady. And that is a scientific fact.

Champ Kind

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It is anchorman, not anchorlady. And that is a scientific fact.

It is anchorman, not anchorlady. And that is a scientific fact.


I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

Ron Burgundy

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I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.


I read somewhere their periods attract bears. Bears can smell the menstruation.

I read somewhere their periods attract bears. Bears can smell the menstruation.

Brick Tamland

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I read somewhere their periods attract bears. Bears can smell the menstruation.

I read somewhere their periods attract bears. Bears can smell the menstruation.


There were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.

There were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.

Brick Tamland

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There were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.

There were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.


Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means...

Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means “a whale’s vagina.”

Ron Burgundy [on San Diego]

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Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means…

Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means “a whale’s vagina.”


Oh, I can barely lift my right arm ’cause I did so many. I don’t know if you heard me...

Oh, I can barely lift my right arm ’cause I did so many. I don’t know if you heard me counting. I did over a thousand.

Ron Burgundy [on bicep curls]

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Oh, I can barely lift my right arm ’cause I did so many. I don’t know if you heard me…

Oh, I can barely lift my right arm ’cause I did so many. I don’t know if you heard me counting. I did over a thousand.


I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.

I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.

Ron Burgundy

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I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.

I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.


I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you...

I wanna say something. I’m gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don’t, send it right back. I want to be on you.

Ron Burgundy

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I wanna say something. I’m gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you…

I wanna say something. I’m gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don’t, send it right back. I want to be on you.


I would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.

I would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.

Brick Tamland

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I would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.

I would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.


You are a smelly pirate hooker. Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island?

You are a smelly pirate hooker. Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island?

Ron Burgundy

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You are a smelly pirate hooker. Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island?

You are a smelly pirate hooker. Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island?


I love lamp.

I love lamp.

Brick Tamland

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I love lamp.

I love lamp.


[via thehollywoodgossip]

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